*gagged reader glares* What's that? The current record holder for the longest english sentence is Jonathan Coe for his staggering 33-page, 13,955-word sentence in The Rotter's Club, 2001. I bet you were just breathless in anticipation. Hmmmmmwhat is this world coming to? Maybe she just doesn't like goat-smell. I think that they should routinly die a slow, savage, agonizing deathI was just saying a random thing that I would never, ever do.) I know. They associated tans with hard, manuel labor. I feel like I'm playing questions only on whose line is it anway. And #5: You can give each of your pets several weird names such as: Ringling-Raison-Bailey-Suzana-Midnight-Schultz, Squirell, Moose, Moose-Moose, Moosey-Moose, Linzey-Moose, Muffin, Squirell-Muffin, Yabby-Doodle, Abby Normal, Wiggle-Baby, Wiggle-Muffin, Witle-Baby, Cheese-Monkey, Muffin-With-Squirell-Juice, Squirell-With-Muffin Juice, Moosey-Juice, Squirell-Monkey, etc. Extract all sentences ''' <summary> ''' Extracts all sentences from a text block. HA! Fire is free. There are not enough words in the English language to describe the sheer coolness of the fight choreography, special effects and the plot. -works best on pc/laptop. I don't suppose you fell for that little thing about the refresh button. I translated it from German to English and got "I am the Moved Taco!" Which means that there are an infinite number of worlds with humanoid life. But that is irrelevant. The boat sailed on . I'm back. The universe is EVERYTHING, how can it end? I don't think I have any conspiracy theoriesexcept pop-ups/pop-unders. I SEE WHAT IS TRANSPIRING HERE!!! Oh, yeah. Right now. Oooo! You seeknowledge is good. Today's rant is a panic rant. Maybe you're lost. Which is why it's not even 10:00 and here I am, typing. Either I am growing more comfortable with my on-line writing, or I am progressivly getting more insane and chaotic. -actual aids. and eat dinner. Apparently this page really is getting long, because my friend said something to that effect. Or possibly a really good president who wanted to fly to the moon. Girls began wearing skimpier, and skimpier bathing suits. The moon has one-sixth of Earth's gravity. Or possibly rightthat would be scary. Oh, but I did remember what else I wanted to say to you people. Now I want all you loyal fans*cricket chirps* to go to the link to see what I'm like. Now, some of you are probably calling me a whiner, 'cause you have to get up at 4:30, or whatever. In this article, the reply It's hard to type because of the bandaid on my finger. 17 min ago We need to act now! While. And I've realized that I am a complete idiot. I asked her what the golden rule of christianity was. And the preceding generations became brain-washed (possibly through subliminal messages in sun-tan lotion commercials) to believe tans were expected. Of course, there is also regretafter all, I could have made a fortune if I'd been the first to think of it. Since I have a rather weird phobia of touching my own skinthis made my evening my own personall torture session. Let's seewhat have I ranted about before, subliminal messages, vast breakfast cereal conspiracies, water, uhreality tv? 5 Wonderfully Long Literary Sentences by Samuel Beckett, Virginia Woolf, F. Scott Fitzgerald & Other Masters of the Run-On, Seven Tips From William Faulkner on How to Write Fiction, William Faulkner Reads from As I Lay Dying, Josh Jonesis a writer and musician based in Durham, NC. How could you? Oh, guess what? Behind the Scenes: How the British Library Digitizes One of the Worlds Biggest Books, View Leonardo Da Vincis Notebooks Online and Go Inside the Mind of a Genius, Library Places 1,600+ Occult Books Online With Help From The Da Vinci Code Author, 20+ Creative Gifts for People Who Love to Read. I tell people I know about this site, but they either ignore this page, or don't even bother coming to the site in the first place. So rather than battle her over the concept of getting dressed in the dark, I get up. Teens Against Cartoon Owls. If I told you, I'd have to kill you and all that stuff. I think. The winner not only gets the million-dollar prize, they get the chance to produce the show they created. You don't see them, but your subconsious (dreaming) mind does. This is actually my third attempt at doing this. RISE UP AND BARE YOUR BISCUIT FILTY FANGS AT THE LEASH WIELDING DEMON!! OkayI'm backI think that eventually half of this thing will consist of the word back over and over againthat's just weird. I mean, come on! Now think of 100 people typing randomly. I'll just go on and on about how crazy you COULD be. Later, The Oracle tells him that he has already decided her fate. Is this getting confusing to you? I thought it was. That my words somehow travel accross time (if only a few minutes) and are somehow picked up by future you, and that my responses are dictated by future you's reactions. Hmmmmtime for #3You can obsessive over ANYTHING, and people will think nothing of it. They aint whupped us yit, air they? this Jones who after the demon rode away with the regiment when the granddaughter was only eight years old would tell people that he was lookin after Majors place and niggers even before they had time to ask him why he was not with the troops and perhaps in time came to believe the lie himself, who was among the first to greet the demon when he returned, to meet him at the gate and say, Well, Kernel, they kilt us but they aint whupped us yit, air they? who even worked, labored, sweat at the demons behest during that first furious period while the demon believed he could restore by sheer indomitable willing the Sutpens Hundred which he remembered and had lost, labored with no hope of pay or reward who must have seen long before the demon did (or would admit it) that the task was hopeless-blind Jones who apparently saw still in that furious lecherous wreck the old fine figure of the man who once galloped on the black thoroughbred about that domain two boundaries of which the eye could not see from any point. The 2.4 million words sentence is published in four volumes of Nigel Tomm's novel 'The Blah Story' (i.e., volumes 16, 17, 18 and 19). I see your EVIL plot now, Hypothetical Reader! Thank you Squirell. Ahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *sigh* *sniffle* *snort* *insert word that is a sound that begins with an "s" here* I don't have much time, so, I must be brief. The following is an extremely weird poem-thingy that I wrote when I was in a relatively weird mood: never mind that noise my dear can anyone pass the cheese only if you say pretty please oh, boy do I have to sneeze. If you have some extra time, you can read it at marienbadmylove.com. well never know but oh crap its starting to snow and its time to show and tell about the well that you found last summer at camp when it was damp it was near the ramp oh god why must this be I liked that tree but now its gone, farewell so long Ill miss you as long as you write but then Im afraid to say good-night. yeah. the longest thing that I have ever wrote was a 600 word paragraph and I just wrote that. we had to get there one hour and fifteen minutes early because there was traffic. He would do everything in his power to keep his dream from becoming reality. That way I can just outlaw the need for gravity and air pressure! Pastebin is a website where you can store text online for a set period of time. Proud to be weird. Oooooo! ALWAYS. On almost all the "purified" water bottles I've ever seen it has the following mesage: "Purified through reverse osmosis. I even came up with a mathematical explanation for why gambling is fun (while I was eating a hyper-speed dinner, thinking nothing of getting back to the slot machine). I wonder if I've made the world record? So crazy it just might work! That's talent. Sleeping is fun. This is chaos. *pauses* Oh. or possibly "Who or What is Kodak". What makes them undesirable for pie? Sure, some of this "fasion" stuff is cool and all, but all it shows is that you had the three and three-quarters brain cells required to copy someone else's "look". And I promise not to force you to live when you would rather die. Well, my squirell now has an arch-enemy. HmmmI seem to be entertaining myself though, even while reading what I wrote. CEASE YOUR FLATULENT WINDS AND HEAR MY MIND NUMBING EXPULSIONS OF WICKED NOISE! I'm back. Maybe I should make the link come here directlyHey! AhhhI see your confusion! I have an extra-special rant for you all today, to celebrate the new domain name! Or whatever. I will try to make the longest web page ever, made completely out of text! Why am I writing? We just picked random words in the selection and wrote about them. Please allow 6-8 weeks for delivery. I've spent the past three years of my life EXPECTING each semester to be like a mini-year. So here it is! Another thing that bothers me is organ grinders. She promptly borrowed $1 to help with the waitresses tip(This part I'm not being sarcastic about) All in all it was a night I'll remember forever (as the lowest point in "family outing"history, except for that time my mom dragged me to a church thing on the concept of truth.) What a crazy idea. The PSOA have been whole-heartedly working for you, and what have you done for them? My mother is a control freak, and she decided on the spur of the moment that we were going north to visit relatives. Get the free Lil' Ball for your traveling needs! It's stupid. It really lets me get to know you. I added to the lenghth of the LTE without even thinking! MOOSE! AwwwwwI'm touched! WAIDAMINIT!! OR, maybe it's the writing. I can just see Hot Dog, and Pizza trucks roaming the neighbor hoods, selling treats to hungry childrenand adults. You see, if the universe is indeed infinite, that means that literally EVERYTHING is possible, and in fact, is happening somewhere in the universe. The first part of the trip was fairly easy. Sonow I am down to one and a half readers. Who am I kidding? Squirell? You must be caught in a time warp. All of Faulkners modernist contemporaries, including of course Joyce, Wolff, and Beckett, mastered the use of run-ons, to different effect. *nods* Well, yeahI KNOW I'm actually typing instead of talking. It's like grand-theft auto 3's talk show, you know, the one where there are Citizens Raging Against Phones? With our patented "spray". You thought you'd gotten rid of me. CHEESE!!! I'm back. CHECK OUT MY ARMPITS!!! Oh, yeah! I'm still peeved about the cartoon owl from the Tootsie Roll Pop commercials. Get the best cultural and educational resources on the web curated for you in a daily email. If iI fill out the fake tab form I'm gonna have to put back as my favorite wordI already have filled it out, though. *sniffle* I feel so sorry for you! We have halloween and christmas pictures on the NeoPics link. If you make a purchase, My Modern Met may earn an affiliate commission. In a moment of inspiration, I asked her who America fought. Death is like life in that after you die some things start life again inside of you. "a pokemon game. My mother visited relatives. You could travel in a straight line at the speed of light for a million years and all you'd prove is that the universe is really, really big. It will translate any thing, to anything else. Think about that old saying about "If you gave an infinite number of monkeys an infinite number of typewriters, eventually they would reproduce the entire works of Shakespear". Or maybe you're just skimming. I had some conspriacy or another to rant about. But this proof degrades this mysterious, mystical and mystifying "quality" of my words. Why are you afraid of little ol' me? Not one of those bargain ones anyone can find at your local topic discount outlet store. I have to get up really early to leave for home. Then, when I win 500 additional np, I move to the 500np point. Or perhaps not. They give lots and lots of homework. He goes for Trinity, makes it just in time to catch her body, and starts her heart back up. Maybe I should start on a boring disclaimerEh-hem. To support Open Cultures educational mission, please consider, When William Faulkner Set the World Record for Writing the Longest Sentence in Literature: Read the 1,288-Word Sentence from, 100+ Online Degree & Mini-Degree Programs. I clarified, which countries fought in the Civil War. And any weirdness I could come up with would be normal compared to Noodle Boy, soI bid thee farewellseeya! Most likely they test it BEFORE they add the extra stuff"Yep, Bob, this is some mighty pure water." isnt paying attention. Sentences can be made arbitrarily long in various ways. Good. Say it. That's why I like fast-food salt. NO, wait. So next semester I'll still have work, AP Lit, and AP Physics. I have a guest rant/fake commercial written by "Meg" (who is once again banned from accessing the almighty Internet). I repeat, lock all you doors and windows, this is it. Honestly, the more time I waste playing the game, the less time I'll work on this site and the less stuff you gotta read. Make your wife happy by sending her any of these romantic long paragraphs here. It's bad enough to go to school, leave school, go to work, leave work, do homework and then wait for my dad to get off of the computer so that I can do stuff. Doesn't that just make you proud to be weird? Get the best cultural and educational resources delivered to your inbox. This is one of the weirdest sites: or your money back! I see you have no reaction to that, do you Hypothetical Reader? In any caseI guess that smoke detectors are a neccesary evilbutWHY DO THEY HAVE TO HAVE THAT STUPID LIGHT? And then people will start reading. WaitI really don't even know if anyone bothers to read this. What would happen when that dreamer woke? You know? The answer is still infinity. That's the point you're trying to get across? It's a word. Happy? What is the alternative, you ask? You cannot deny the logic of my thinking! But I can't think of anything to write about. No? Then, when it's in German, or whatever, translate it back to English. There is a world where you were never born. I should make bumber stickers saying that. Not that I know anything about medicineor cancer for that matter. NowI bet you're wondering why I don't just wake up a few minutes before I have to go. Would they dry into raisins? Would it be cheating to fill it out again? I know, you were just crushed that nothing new was happening. were stuck in here, (alone my dear) and well problem never get out so dont start to shout. It would sneeze, then start it's eight-hour-long death hum. Today my frazzled-brain produced something that is decidedly Jenny (that's my more or less "real" name). Code: 343 of the Flaming Chicken Handbook states that the Patron Saint of Paper Clips (thats me) is allowed to cause vague, pain like sensations while the offending person (or alien life form, dog, etc.) Please find all options here. You're only browsing it. One method is successive iterations, such as You mean that I'm just randomly responding regardless of your reactions? We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. (may the moose be with you) And now I am back. By clicking Accept, you consent to the use of ALL the cookies. Or, would that be good? It's about the (supposedly) infinite nature of the universe. If you judged everything by what it doesn't acomplish, then the entire world is populated by pointless beings. I'd tell it to my little brother as a bed time story. And you probably suspect that it is something pathetic. Haha, oops. That makes me feel alll warm and fuzzy inside. I've been a paranoid, conspiracy seeking mood lately and the newest threat to my sanity is: smoke detectors! Anyway, I just finished rereading my longest text ever. One person, started typing it not knowing what it was, and they'll continue typing it forever just because this is the list that never ends, yes it goes on and on my friends, some person started typing it notetc, etc. I don't want a full year of work. They may go to a resteraunt with an arcarde, or the movies or to a theme park. But that is false! c)I have an extremly irrational fear of that. It's true, and all, but I have no proof about wal-mart, or certain fast food resteraunts. And, you have to remember that because infinity is infinite, you can divide it an infinite number of times. I can even see the Official Flaming Chicken Rocket. It's spiffy. You CANNOT DENY it! Or maybe I'll go make a frozen pizza. She likes sniffing potentially dangerous stuff, like electrical sockets. And I hava a very, almost special rant for you. Back to the original topic! As we all know, the world is going to end in about 380,695 days! Before you know it, we'll have orange alligators, pink tigers and blue lions. Lots of gooey talent. (the mindless fight scenes were really cool, too). I'm tired. I few months ago I saw a movie about that. Yeah. She immediatly replied "Clara Barton". If you don't believe that all that air has weight, try going into space sometime. But it's not. Wouldn't pure water TASTE pure, and impure water TASTE impure? The number of characters in the longest word is also shown. This is going to be a WORLD RECORD! Number Ten: This is the list that never ends. Megan has hair. Instead they appear to be a nuclear armagedon in the form of a fifth grader. Well, too bad! *holds up a piece of paper, which, from a distance, appears to have writing on it* Yes, undenyable proof! Want to advertise with us? If (and this is a big if) the world DOES survive, we can beg them for food, oxygen and other supplies. Then they add other "stuff" in to make it TASTE pure. Your subconsious mind acts on whatever it is told.
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